One more chance..

Its time that I write something about the most important person in my life...

Someone who never left me, even when i was at my worst..

Someone whom I have hurt so many times..yet decided to stay..

Someone whom I almost lost..Gosh, the thought makes me cringe.

2008 was my worst year in my life so far..It was hell..but it was not because of the people who came into my life that year..it was because that was the year I pushed away an angel I have for so long. In my desire to find romance, romance that he is really not into, I looked around...exposed myself to what I thought were better. In my yearning to explore, I left him out. As i pushed him away, i began to loose strength, confidence and respect for myself. For all i thought, it was part of the transition. I was so wrong. I was so stupid.

When I was feeling so weak, it was him I tended to run. When I was so confused, he helped me cleared my mind. When i lost focus, he gave me direction. When i was having fun, he kept mum and accepted the pain. When I was not being myself, he reminded me of who I am. When i lost respect to myself, he loved me even more. When i got nowhere to go, he showed me he is just beside me. When I was being unreasonable, he went beyond reasons to understand. When I was pushing him away, he stayed.

When I forgot about us..he lifted us to God.

With the recent happenings, I learned a lot of things. Inspite of all he has done for me, I cannot still say he is perfect. He has his shortcomings as well. He cannot do every little thing that would make me happy. He is not into mushy surprises. He is not into giving flowers. He may not text me with all those sweet stuff. And yes, he may also expose him self to temptations.

Through this I learned how true it is that happiness is not having what you want but wanting what you have. We cannot really have contentment, but by appreciating what we have, one will find happiness from within. And yes, no one is perfect. Everybody has the tendency to commit mistake. But the more important thing is our being able to forgive. and truly forget. and trust. and love. and prepare one self for another possible mistake. and forgive. forget. trust. and love even more - a cycle that we should get through- together.

For all this, I am thankful. For I can see why God let it happen. He made me see that the person that I have right now, is the one I would want to spend the rest of my life with. The one who is truly meant for me. The one whom I am looking forward to be going through The Cycle. And truly, love is strongest when you still opt to trust even when there is too much doubt.

I love you bebeko..